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	Nobody knew Helens secret. It was hers and not to be shared. Helen had been married to Steve for 10 years. Two years after the marriage Helen gave up full time work when she got pregnant with the twins. When the twins started in full time school she started working part time in the local library. Three mornings a week and every other Saturday. It was the two mornings a week when Helen did not work that her secret would surface. Though Helen was very much in love with Steve and they had a good sex life this did not satisfy Helens secret desires. Helen had a love for things too secret to tell her Steve about. It had all started when she became very ill in her late teens. She was running a temperature and in agony. Her parents were away for the weekend and Helen was unsure what to do. She put herself to bed with a jug of water by her side and just tried to sleep. She had not realised just how dangerous a kidney infection could be and just how sick she was. She would wake up and take a drink of the water and then fall back into unsettled sleep. She would dream and wake up and the dreams would continue as hallucinations. She needed help but was to ill to care. She had been in bed for most of the day. Something inside her made her wake. It was a strong urge, she struggled to shake off the sleep that clung to her, trying to get her mind clear and her eyes focused. She groaned in agony, not sure if the pain was in her stomach or her back. “Mum” she moaned but she knew no one was there. She knew her parents would not be home until the following evening, but then she was not sure how long she had been in bed. She realised she was covered in sweat. Helen tried to focus on her bedside clock; it said 3:52 but was that am or pm? She had no idea. She dragged herself into a sitting position. She could see daylight through the curtains so it must be pm. I have only been in bed a few hours she thought, thinking back to when she had started to feel ill just after midday on Saturday. Mum and dad would not be home until Sunday night. She was to ill to wait, she needed to do something. She was in agony and cried out as she dragged herself up. Sitting on the edge of the bed she reached for the glass next to the jug of water. It was empty. That was when she realised that she needed the toilet very badly. She needed to pee. Unsteadily she tried to get to her feet but the pain was too great and she fell to her knees. “MUM” she cried out. The little girl in her coming out. At 19 she was very much an adult but at times like this she wanted her mum. Crawling on hands and knees she made her way to the bathroom, groaning in pain every foot she moved took so much effort she was exhausted. It was no use, she slumped against the door post. The pain made her groan, she needed to pee but it was to much effort for her to move. She lay on the floor and as sleep started to take hold of her once more she felt a warm comforting release engulf her as she drifted back to sleep. As she slept she dreamt of being in a warm cloud floating in the sky, it was a cloud of warm bubbles, wet and soft and comforting. As she drifted along suddenly the warmth became cold and she felt like she was falling. She woke with a start. Still laying on the floor in her doorway, she was cold and shivering. She was scared, more scared than she had ever been in her life. She knew she was ill she knew she needed help. “MUM” she cried out tears rolling down her cheeks. “Helen, where are you, what’s up” Helens parents arriving home must have woken her. Helen had slept all through Saturday and had woken at 3:50pm on the Sunday. Luckily her parents had arrived home just after five and found her lying in her doorway. They called an ambulance and Helens spent a week in hospital. The dreams and hallucinations she had experienced during her illness kept coming back to her. She remembered so vividly the one of her floating on a cloud, the warmth and the sense of relief kept washing over her. It felt good, almost sexual. Helen put it to the back of her mind. She did not want to admit what had made her have such a lovely dream. It was only after the twins were born and Helen had been talking to Pam her best friend about what the gas and air was like she had used during labour. “I kept thinking there were balloons in the room” she told Pam “I kept saying “why are there balloons?” but not like kids balloons but big hot air balloons” “You were in a bigger room that I was when I had Simon” Pam joked. ”No, no” Helen giggled “They were full sized air balloons and yet they fitted just fine” “It’s strange what drugs do to the mind” Pam had said “hallucinating, some people pay good money to have trips like that” “I don’t want any more trips” Helen said “The only other time was when I had a kidney infection and almost died” It was later that day as Helen washed up after tea that the memories of her dreams and hallucinations from when she was so ill came back to her. She thought of the floating and the warmth and the wetness. She shook herself out of the day dream. She did not want to think about it. Yet she felt horny, hornier than she had felt since the twins were born. The twins were now six years old and Helen had for the past year allowed her secret to come out. Not to Steve or Pam nor anyone else, but just to herself. She had suspected that she had peed herself when she had been on the floor in the doorway and that was what had sparked the dream. The relief of her bladder emptying alongside the warmth of her own urine, had made her dream that lovely dream. As she awoke the cold of laying on the floor in the wet had hit her, this mixed with the pain she had been in, all mixed up together and made her very horny whenever she thought of it. Tuesday and Friday mornings Steve took the twins to school allowing Helen to stay in bed late on her days off. She would snuggle back down as she heard the door close and drift off back to sleep for an hour before getting up and doing her housework or whatever she had planned for the day. It was on one of these mornings that Helen woke up from her morning doze hot and horny, she had been dreaming of needing to pee and being naked in a beautiful meadow, but instead of being embarrassed by her nakedness she had revelled in it. Helen let her hand go between her legs, she found her clit and gently rubbed it. She needed to pee, but the bed and her finger were more inviting. She realised just how wet she was and let her finger move down from her clit and slip effortlessly into her cunt. Helen had masturbated that day with a full bladder and as she orgasmed she felt like she was floating, her body rocking with energy. She heard herself gasp as the orgasm took hold and wash over her body, her cunt muscles contracting around her fingers. The morning masturbation became a regular occurrence. Helen had started to get up and see Steve and the twins off so that she could drink a few glasses of water. She wanted her bladder as full as possible before going back to bed. Once back in bed she would work her fingers on her eager clit and stuff them hard up her wet cunt, all the time thinking about her bladder, thinking about her need to pee. She would work hard pushing her fingers in deep, spreading her fingers to open her cunt and then stuffing them in and out, her wetness splashing, making her movements glide. Her orgasms were strong and hard and she would lay in bed after waiting for her body to return to normal, stroking her nipples or gently stroking her clit. As her body came back to her so did the need to pee. It was stronger than ever yet she would not go to the bathroom. She would lay on the bed focusing on the feeling, crossing her legs to stop herself peeing. She would play with her nipples, tweaking them and twisting them, wanting the sexual pain she got when Steve would treat them in this way. She would stay in bed as long as she could before finally running to the bathroom and enjoying the feeling of relief as she sat on the toilet and peed. Helen wanted more than just her fingers to satisfy herself. Steve had never been interested in using vibrators or a dildo so they did not have any. Helen knew there was a sex shop in the city so planned a trip there on her next day off. She walked past it several times before going in. She kept saying to herself that no-one would know her so what was the problem. All her nerves soon went when she saw how nice it was inside. It was not as seedy as she had imagined and all the lovely sexy clothes were around the walls and on rails. Then there was a section with DVD’s and magazines and a massive section of toys. Helen chose a vibrating dildo and a G-Spot vibrator. She was about to go to the counter to pay when she noticed nipple clamps. She had no idea what nipple clamps were but she did not need to use her imagination to much too work out what they did. She left the shop with her purchases and hid them at home until her next day off. The vibrators and nipple clamps added to her day off morning pleasure. Steve was not missing out either. Helen was finding that she lusted after his body even more now that her secret itch was being scratched. However there was still one thing that Helen wanted but was not ready to try. She wanted to pee herself. She was not sure if it was one of those things, a fantasy that once made real would not live up to the fantasy and she feared if she did pee herself during masturbation and it was not as she had expected she would lose the desire and the pleasure in her secret morning masturbation. She also had the problem of the mess. If she peed the bed she would not have just the bedding to wash, but the mattress. She needed some way of keeping everything dry. She thought about doing it in the bathroom but that did not appeal to her. Then she had an idea. A shower curtain. She could lay it on the mattress and that would keep everything clean. Helen bought a new shower curtain for the house and then kept the old one for her morning fun. She had made up her mind to try it. She got up early and drank a pint of water as Steve got ready for work. She made the twins their breakfast and drank some juice as she went around. As she waved Steve and the twins goodbye her stomach was leaping with anticipation. She drank another glass of water; she already wanted to pee but wanted to make sure she would be able to go through with her plan. She took of the duvet and laid the old shower curtain over the bed. She got her vibrators and nipple clamps ready then decided that laying on the shower curtain would not be very comfortable, so she got a large bath towel and lay that over the top. She lay down on the towel and started to play between her legs. It did not feel right somehow. She needed to pee, she was alone and she was horny. It was the duvet, she always masturbated under the duvet and only threw it off if she got to hot towards the end. She lent over the bed and pulled the duvet over her. She snuggled into the towel. She liked the feel of the towel under her as it made her remember what she was going to do. She placed the nipple clamps on her nipples and let her finger play with her clit, she was wet and felt very sexy. She placed the G-Spot vibrator into her cunt. This was by far the better of the two toys she had bought. She moved it in and out with her right hand as it vibrated on a low setting. Her left hand stroked and rubbed her clit. “You dirty little pee whore” She said out loud to herself. The thought of what she was doing, the being dirty was part of the fantasy part of what turned her on. “If Steve could see you now he would be ashamed” she kept up the rhythm, the vibrator going gently in and out stimulating her g-spot her fingers rubbing her clit. As she built up the speed she turned the vibrator up higher and circled her clit. “Pee, go on slut, pee” her breath was quickening her words no more than gasps. She wanted to pee but not yet. She wanted it to last, she kept moving the vibrator, she kept working on her clit, the nipple clamps biting into her tender nipples. She was getting hot, sweat running down her back. She threw the duvet off her and turned the vibrator onto its highest. She let out a little squeal of pleasure as the vibrator sloshed in and out of her soaking cunt. She reached up with her left hand and twisted the clamps to intensify the pain. “Pee slut” she breathed to herself. But as she lay there the vibrator working in and out she was not able to pee. She took a deep breath and tried hard to pee, still working the vibrator in and out of her cunt. It was no good, she could not do it. She stopped moving the vibrator leaving it buzzing inside her cunt and lay still a little disappointed at not being able to pee. Then it happened, just a dribble at first. “Yes” she said out loud and pushed sending a short spurt of piss out of her onto the towel. She felt the wetness, the warmth and she relaxed into the feeling. The flow came strong and hard, warm wet piss soaking the towel beneath her, creeping up over her buttocks and down her legs. It was heaven, the vibrator still stimulating her she took hold of it once more and worked it on her g-spot and with her free hand she reached down, first playing with her clit but then feeling the wetness of the towel. She was wet in every way now, her cunt juices spurted from her mingling with her pee, her back arching as the pleasure built. She was a pee slut laying in her own piss, sexually turned on by it, loving the warmth and the total feeling of disgust at herself. Her body reached orgasm and she gave out a loud “YES YES” as her body jerked and her cunt tightened around the vibrator. Her fantasy had been fulfilled and it had not disappointed her.

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